Having digestive issues

Today started out a little crummy for me but it got better once I saw my lil Tino. I was just having a very emotional morning. It is funny that I felt this way today because just yesterday I wrote a comment on another blog how relaxed/anxiety free I have felt in a long time. Well that all flew out the window sometime last night.
Some are probably wondering how I can feel relaxed when my baby is in the hospital. I just don't feel stressed by little things that used to make me so tense. All that matters to me now is my family and their well being. I know my baby is being watched over by our Creator.
Back to why I was so emotional this morning. Santino was doing really well for a week or so and just last Friday he had a couple of set backs. I think it just hit me that there will probably be many setbacks and who knows when he will be able to come home w/ me. It is hard understanding everything that happens w/ him and the severity of it. The Dr.s and nurses deal w/ this all the time so when something happens it is no big deal to them but as a mother everything is a big deal to me. What caused this anxiety in me was that they stopped feeding Tino last night because he had spit up and his spit up was a greenish tinge. He spit up last night also and it was brown. So what the nurse told me was that the coloring means he hasn't been digesting his food all the way and it has been sitting in his tummy. So they stopped his feeds to let what he does have left have time to digest. They also started him on some meds to help get his system going and to help reduce the acid in his stomach. Hopefully tomorrow morning they will begin feeding him again.
When I was w/ Tino today he was a little crabby from being hungry but he settled down pretty easily. I got to hold him the whole time I was there so that was good. He seemed to enjoy it. I wish I was able to stay w/ him all night to comfort him. When I called and checked on him this evening he was snoozing. That always makes me feel better and less guilty. I hate when I call and can hear him crying in the background, that just breaks my heart.
Seeing him and holding him eased my anxiety. Looking at his lil face he looks like a healthy baby boy. I'm so blessed to be able to hold him, kiss him, talk to him, and look at him. I have to remind myself and be reminded sometimes (Lisa) how blessed we are to have him here with us and the fact that I get to do all those things. I do get scared that he can be taken away but I have to cherish each day I have with him.
That goes for my other two also.